Verse One: Humpty Hump (Shock G)

All right!
Stop whatcha doin'
'cause I'm about to ruin
the image and the style that ya used to.
I look funny,
but yo I'm makin' money, see
so yo world I hope you're ready for me.
Now gather round
I'm the new fool in town
and my sound's laid down by the Underground.
I drink up all the Hennessey ya got on ya shelf
so just let me introduce myself
My name is Humpty, pronounced with a Umpty.
Yo ladies, oh how I like to hump thee.
And all the rappers in the top ten--please allow me to bump thee.
I'm steppin' tall, y'all,
and just like Humpty Dumpty
you're gonna fall when the stereos pump me.
I like to rhyme,  
I like my beats funky,
I'm spunky.  I like my oatmeal lumpy.
I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack
but sometimes I get ridiculous
I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice
hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish?
Yeah, I called ya f
Bab's Uvula Who lyrics

I've got a knack for freaking everything up
My temper flies and I get myself all wound up
My fuse is short and my blood pressure is high
I lose control and I get myself all wound up
Tension mounts and I fly off the wall
I self destruct and I get myself all wound up
Petulance and irritation sets in
I throw a tantrum and I get myself all wound up

I lose myself and I'm all wound up
Petulance and I'm all wound up
at.    
Look at me, I'm skinny
It never stopped me from gettin' busy
I'm a freak 
I like the girls with the boom
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
I'm crazy.
Allow me to amaze thee.
They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me.
I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants
and I even got my own dance

{Chorus:}
The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump
Do the Humpty Hump, come on and do the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, just watch me do the Humpty Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Humpty Hump
Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump

Verse Two:

People say "Yo, Humpty, you're really funny lookin'"
that's all right 'cause I get things cookin'
Ya stare, ya glare, ya constantly try to compare me
but ya can't get near me
I give 'em more, see, and on the floor, B,
all the girls they adore me
Oh yes, ladies, I'm really bein' sincere
'cause in a 69 my humpty nose will tickle ya rear. 
My nose is big, 
Ravenous lyrics


Below the earth lies a serpent
Fire and brimstone
Remove the backbone
Say hello to sunshine
Wake up, you're baptized

The temple is me
Something to believe in
Is something to be

The evidence is all we taste

Under the skin the heart is pumping
What brought you to this?
Meat once was useless
Focus on the fiction
Lose sight of the vision

The temple is me
Something to believe
uh-uh I'm not ashamed
Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid
I get laid by the ladies, ya know I'm in charge,
both how I'm livin' and my nose is large
I get stoopid, I shoot an arrow like Cupid,
I use a word that don't mean nothin', like looptid
I sang on Doowhutchalike, and if ya missed it,
I'm the one who said just grab 'em in the biscuits
Also told ya that I like to bite
Well, yeah, I guess it's obvious, I also like to write.
All ya had to do was give Humpty a chance 
and now I'm gonna do my dance.

{Chorus}

Breakdown:

Oh, yeah, that's the break, y'all
Let me hear a little bit of that bass groove right here
Oh, yeah!
Now that I told ya a little bit about myself
let me tell ya a little bit about this dance
It's real easy to do--check it out

Verse Three:

First I limp to the side like my leg was broken
Shakin' and twitchin' kinda like I was smokin'
Crazy wack funky
People say ya look like M.C. Hamme
Procession lyrics

There is no end to this
I have seen your face
But I don't recognize all these things
You must have left behind
It's a problem, you know
That's been there all your life
I try to make you see the world without a view
That just turn black and white
At night it gets cold and
You'd dearly like to turn away
The escape that fills
that makes you want to turn on heel 
Alone, alone, alone, alone
 
There is no
r on crack, Humpty
That's all right 'cause my body's in motion
It's supposed to look like a fit or a convulsion
Anyone can play this game
This is my dance, y'all, Humpty Hump's my name
No two people will do it the same
Ya got it down when ya appear to be in pain
Humpin', funkin', jumpin',
jig around, shakin' ya rump,
and when the dude a chump pump points a finger like a stump
tell him step off, I'm doin' the Hump.

{Chorus}

Black people, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
White people, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump
Puerto Ricans, do the Humpty Hump, just keep on doin' the hump
Samoans, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump

Let's get stoopid!

{Chorus}

Oh, yeah, come on and break it down

Outro:

Once again, the Underground is in the house
I'd like to send a shout out to the whole world,
keep on doin' the Humpty Dance,
and to the ladies,
peace and humptiness forever

{Music and fade}